Dead Men Tell No Tales – Except In Newest Poster and Trailer Release – 3.4.17

Yo ho, haul together,
hoist the colors high.
Heave ho, thieves and beggars;
never shall we die.

And, apparently, neither shall the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise. However, even though the films have steadily decreased in story quality with each sequel to the original, I have high hopes for the newest installment: Dead Men Tell No Tales. A few days ago, on March 1st, a new poster for the film was released; and it looks all kinds of awesome:

Look! Undead-ghost-sharks! I didn’t know how much I needed these in my life until this very moment.

Also, as you can see from the poster, Geoffrey Rush (Genius) will be reprising his role as Barbossa, Johnny Depp (Mortdecai) as Captain Jack Sparrow, and Jack the Monkey as, well… Jack the Monkey. Orlando Bloom (Lord of the Rings) will also return as Will Turner, Captain of the Flying Dutchman.

However, there are plenty of new faces and characters for us to enjoy. The story seems to follow Henry, played by Brenton Thwaites (The Giver), who is obviously Will Turner’s son (even if IMDb won’t confirm it). From the previous trailer(s) we know that the mysterious, undead Captain Salazar, played by Javier Bardem (Skyfall) has it out for Jack Sparrow (at this point, who doesn’t?). In super-creepy, yet undeniably fantastic fashion, Salazar gave Henry a message: “Tell [Jack Sparrow], death will come straight for him… Will you say that to him, please?”

And, as the newest trailer shows, Henry manages to find Jack and pass on the message. It’s uncanny, how easily Turners are able to find Jack Sparrow. It’s almost as uncanny as how often the place that they find Jack turns out to be a cell of some sort.

Anyway, before I continue, check out the new trailer (released March 2nd) below:

It’s clear that the writers of Dead Men Tell No Tales are returning to their roots, to what made Curse of the Black Pearl so great. There’s a lot in the new trailer that recalls the first film: undead captains with really cool flow-y hair, witty banter and snarky one-liners, Captain Jack Sparrow shenanigans, and fast-paced action.

However, there is a lot that’s different; twists that create so many wonderful questions. For instance, the “Elizabeth Swann” of the film is named Carina Smyth, played by Kaya Scodelario (Maze Runner). She’s apparently an astronomer, and one of our first introductions to her involves Henry saving her from being publicly hanged (which is a really interesting switch from Jack Sparrow being on the gallows in Curse of the Black Pearl). Why is Carina being hanged? Why does Henry want to be “allies” with her? And what does Jack Sparrow need her for?

Other moments from the trailer – the flashbacks to young Jack Sparrow, and whatever he did to Captain Salazar; the Black Pearl in the bottle, a callback to On Stranger Tides); and the freaky-weird but super awesome undead-ghost-sharks – all add up to, what I hope will be, a truly awesome Pirates of the Caribbean movie.

If the writers have nailed that perfect blend of intricate story, hilariously memorable characters, and clever, snappy dialogue, Dead Men Tell No Taleswill be a surefire hit. Just the hints of those things in the trailer is the reason why I’ll be seeing it opening night (May 26th, 2017).

Oh, and did I mention the super cool undead-ghost-sharks? Yeah, those too.